Common Conversations with My Toddler

A conversation during a car ride:   Toddler; Daddy. Guess what. Me: What? Toddler: Chicken butt! maniacal laughter Me: Ah-haha! You got me, buddy. Toddler: Daddy. Guess what. Me: What? Toddler: Chicken underwear! maniacal laughter continues Me: Good one, big guy! Toddler: DADDY! GuESS WhAt! Me: Goodness, what buddy? Toddler: The chicken died. It's a … Continue reading Common Conversations with My Toddler

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From the Town Records of Shadow River

From the public records of the town of Shadow River. City Council Meeting Township of Shadow River Date: August 1, 1998 Mayor: Wynonna Townsend Mayor Townsend: The next item on our docket is an address from concerned citizen Darren Wynette. Concerned Citizen Wynette, adjusts podium mic to accommodate his height: Thank you, Madame Mayor.  clears … Continue reading From the Town Records of Shadow River

Wyndell’s Jargon Experience

"You're older than your parents gave you credit for, Wyndell," chuckled Stacy as she walked away from the team meeting. "You mind telling them that?" Wyndell replied. Wyndell wished he knew what the heck that meant.  Stacy was a coworker near twice his age; wiser, more composed, totally unaware of how Wyndell's parents viewed him.  … Continue reading Wyndell’s Jargon Experience

Must Haves: Parenting Books

Parenthood is a weird, terrible, amusing, gross, lovely, heartening experience full of weird, terrible, amusing, gross, lovely, heartening moments.  There exists myriad tips, tricks, guides, pamphlets, websites, Morse code signals to help parents understand how to not mess up a little human while keeping their sanity, but the go-to is the parenting book. I've skimmed … Continue reading Must Haves: Parenting Books

People on the Highway

The sun is up before I am now! There's so much light on the drive to work these days.  Everything feels simultaneous so much safer and so much more terrifying.  People drive the speed limit in the dark.  That is not true in broad daylight. Today's tale is all about a beater car; brand and … Continue reading People on the Highway

The Subject Line

The various email subject lines Cade Warton typed, reviewed, destroyed, retyped, rethought, re-planned, and finally let someone else handle: Two Week Vacation Package Deals! Two Week Vacation Packaged Deals!!!!!!! Too Weak Vacation Package Deals To weak vacation deals! Salut! I'll take a mocha latte, thanks. Ha! Mary, I just typed that all out. Your Vacation … Continue reading The Subject Line

Mayor Reynolds’ Bad Day (Again. Featuring Evil Rabbits)

Turns out I may have a thing about evil rabbits.  Tonight we're going with an older post.  A fun game I like to play while editing old posts to present as revised is reading the dialogue in Velma, Shaggy, Fred and the rest of the Scooby gang voices.  I believe most of those were provided … Continue reading Mayor Reynolds’ Bad Day (Again. Featuring Evil Rabbits)