Status Update

Status update: Going to Hawaii!

Status update: Airport smells funny.

Status update: Boarding. Phones off.  See you all in twelve hours.

Status update: Landed! Flight only took three hours.

Status update: I’m in Columbus.

Status update: Turns out, it is spelled O A H U.

Status update: Heading home now.

The Worst Place

construction-site-1156567_640“Seriously?”

“I think so.”

“This is not cool.”

“Looks clear.  I’ll head up there.”

“This game of capture the flag is out of control.”

“Get ready to call 911, though.”

“Already on it.”

A Time for Letting Go

morocco-123962_640Axel sang, “but why, oh why, have you left me to die? Was it nature or nurture that lead me here, oh dear, why oh why is the answer unclear?”

He stood, abandoned on the desert, and sent his song to the fleeing car.

“Tell me what did I do today? Tell me how do I prove it’s okay? Tell me, my love and I’ll change everything your way.”

His cell phone buzzed.

“Signal out here, crystal clear!” He sang before looking at the text.

“It’s because of the Michael Bolton impression. I’m leaving you.”

“That stings,” he sang, decrescendo.

The Chart

business-meeting-no-background-2400px

“Quite a chart. What’s the data?”

  “Our Slack bot. When called, it DMs a picture of a pig in boots to the entire team.”

“How does that help?”

  “No idea, but we have 27,000 daily users.”

“I don’t understand what productivity means anymore.”

  “No one does, Char. No one does.”

Image via GDJ

A Very Quiet Six Word Story

the-invisible-man

The Invisible Man was shy too.

Weekend Haiku

Saturday, kids run. 

Monday still so far away. 

Sunday drink coffee.  

Losing My Mind Explained (in 100 words)

“I left it on the night stand.  I’ve left it on the night stand every day for ten years.  I don’t think I know how to put my wallet any where else.  This is insane.  I’m going insane.  The other day I put a book on the dining room table, turned around and when I looked back it was gone,” Ry said, flustered, his voice muffled by walls.

“Did you check the laundry pile?” Mira called back.

As she suggested a new spot, their toddler ran by her waving a wallet over head and maniacally laughing.

“Never mind. Found it.”