Obscure titles worry the tepid reader. Charge at 3%, send final text. Bacon is in my ear. How? The children are silent. Everyone panic. Saturday morning cartoons on a Monday! The last of them has fallen. Wedding suit rests on the bed. There's still bacon in my ear! Wisdom of age proved incredibly useless. No … Continue reading A Few (six) Words on Stuff
"Who's ready for a photo shoot!" The excited photographer asked the young family of three just entering the studio. "I think so," answered Rhonda, "but I don't quite understand the color scheme you requested." "Oh the green? Don't worry a thing about that. This will be a creative journey for you all," explained the photographer, … Continue reading Family Photoshop
"There's something terrifying down in that canyon. My last venture resulted in the loss of three explorers. A creature, born of fire and greed, based on how quickly it moved and devoured all it touched, lurks. Waits. Watches. I saw Predator and thought it was a comedy. No longer shall I laugh, for I have … Continue reading A Warning Ignored
"What makes you interested in this particular program, Mr. Dover?" The admissions counselor asked of "Mr. Dover" much to his delight. No one had ever called him mister before. "Well, I really feel I was born for the mortuary trade." Mr. Dover explained. "Why is that?" "My first name is Keel." "Your name is Keel … Continue reading The Interview
Status update: Going to Hawaii! Status update: Airport smells funny. Status update: Boarding. Phones off. See you all in twelve hours. Status update: Landed! Flight only took three hours. Status update: I'm in Columbus. Status update: Turns out, it is spelled O A H U. Status update: Heading home now.
"Seriously?" "I think so." "This is not cool." "Looks clear. I'll head up there." "This game of capture the flag is out of control." "Get ready to call 911, though." "Already on it."
Axel sang, "but why, oh why, have you left me to die? Was it nature or nurture that lead me here, oh dear, why oh why is the answer unclear?" He stood, abandoned on the desert, and sent his song to the fleeing car. "Tell me what did I do today? Tell me how do … Continue reading A Time for Letting Go