People on the Highway in eBook format with a handful of book only stories is free 9/27 to 10/1! Get your copy here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00VUE2OQS and be sure to check out my other Amazon stuff.
For work I travel between a couple of different locations every day. This is fine, but the travel does take me through the epicenter of a town with nearly twice the population of my own. This population increase amounts to 25,024% increase in traffic at any time of day. The math is weird, but it’s there. The change in seasons has driven (ba dum tss) people absolutely mad this week.
One person really took the title of “totally deranged road warrior” this week though.
Today’s tale: Cookie Monster
Main street. In my mind, this term conjures images of Saturday night cruisin’ in small towns. I don’t think “cruisin'” is a thing anymore and by the look of this particular Main St., neither are small towns. Four lanes going one direction, four lanes going another direction. All four lanes stacked with cars carrying people just wanting to get to point b.
Point B is my favorite destination. By default it is the destination, but that is far from the point. Point B can be work, home, the dentist once every six months or insurance will have a cow, an art studio, a restaurant where your partner awaits your arrival. Point B is the perfect place and everyone wants to be there now. Right now.
Point B is not approaching fast enough for a six wheeled, mega-engine hosting, oversized-to-the-point-of-novelty, Ford truck behind me. Perhaps it is my rear view mirror, but this truck is really, really close to my bumper. Rather, it is really, really close to the center of my back window because its bumper is a full story higher than my own. The truck is enormous.
I think drivers of these oversized trucks believe that for the safety of all those around them, smaller vehicles are obligated to move out of the way. Smaller vehicles are much easier to move, after all. The driver behind me is just looking out for all of us by reminding me that I should be in a different lane. Of course, I can’t move lanes because of the surrounding smaller vehicles. If only they knew they were in the way!
I’m not too bothered by it. My Point B this trip is a work site. I get to go run an audit or something. They’ll remind when we I arrive. I’m not about to wreck my car for work, so slow and steady wins this race. The truck behind me though, they have a Point B that is out of this world.
The truck is driven by 50-something, Wil Creekman. Wil has a scraggly beard that is more gray than he wants it to be, but won’t admit to thinking about such matters. He works as the western region sales manager of a grain silo company. I have no idea what that means, but it involves big trucks in hip areas of Colorado’s Front Range.
Wil is a guy who relies not on few words, but on precisely chosen words. This clever frugality of words has made its way into the very essence of his being. He finds cheap ways to make the finest homemade beer; absolute award winners if he were to go the home brew award circuit route. He creates all the art in his home himself, using homemade dyes, and receives compliments for the endeavor. Wil is a great combination is efficient, cheap, talented and some sort of X factor that makes him an all star of the grain silo sales world.
Wil is going to employ this skill when he arrives at his Point B today. He’s going to the grocery store. The local grocery store has an immense bakery section. Fresh doughnuts, bagels, cinnamon rolls, daily breads, cakes; you name it, this bakery has it or has it in the works. The array of sweets and other delicious items always results in nearby children pleading for some sugary goodies. The bakers hate to hear the whines of children and countered the problem by offering free sugar-free cookies to kids passing by. These cookies are held in a special tray and marked “For Kids!” in a colorful, comic-sans adjacent font.
Wil is going to walk by that tray of free cookies for kids, clearly marked as just for children, and take one for himself during his grocery run.
Wil is a monster.
Thanks for reading!
One last in-post reminder: People on the Highway in eBook format with a handful of book only stories is free 9/27 to 10/1! Get your copy here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00VUE2OQS and be sure to check out my other Amazon stuff.