Tina and Tony Have a New House

Tina and Tony loved their new house.  The kitchen was perfect, the bedrooms were perfect, the bathrooms (yes, plural) were perfect, the yard was perfect, the grains on the hardwood floors were perfect.  Their neighbors to the south were absolutely ideal.  Even the mortgage was no source of complaint.

There was just one, tiny, tiny issue that was proving difficult to work through.

“AHHHHHHH!”

Tina shook her head and tried to ignore the sound. Again.

Tony, on the other hand, had not yet adapted.  A plate he was attempting to wash dropped onto the kitchen floor and shattered.

“I can’t take this anymore!” Tony said.

“AHHHHHH!”

“The realtor said we would get used to it after a few months.” Tina tried to calm her husband.

“AHHHHHH!”

“Why do the saws at Clancy’s Saw Mill have to scream when they are in use? Why? It makes no sense! No sense! Someone had to do a lot of math to make that exact pitch exist when those pine boards are sliced in half.  Someone very, very smart figured out where to place a blade, how high it has to sit, how the boards have to move around the blade.  They were paid to do this.  They missed time with their families, friends and hobbies for the sole purpose of making that building next door scream like a teenager in a Nightmare on Elm Street movie.” Tony ranted.

“AHHHHH!”

“And why is it a 24 hour facility? There’s no reason to it.  The mortgage is more expensive than money. I’m so tired. So tired.” Tony cried.

“You’re not getting out of dish duty,” Tina said.

“Ah!” Tony replied.

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