Must Haves: Camp Fire Stories

Friends circling a crackling camp fire under the stars.  Pretty amazing scenario.  It can get better though! Throwing out a scary story or two elevates the camping experience to campy experience in the blink of an eye.  Or telling of a tale as it were.

Camp fire stories of old focused on radio reports, mad men on the loose, murders that happened right. where. you. are sitting! ARGH!  Tough sell these type of stories.  First off, radio is dead. Mad men on the loose would be a twitter trending topic within minutes and if a murder happened where you’re sitting, Wikipedia would certainly know something about that.  I’m not saying the availability of information killed scary stories, it simply made them tougher.

Now the tale has to center around creating some sort of intrinsic, existential dread.  The sort of fear that makes people call in sick on Monday because they just don’t see the purpose of it anymore.  Oh yeah.  Now those are some good camp fire stories.  I’m not inviting on too many camping trips these days, thanks for asking.

Here now, must have topics for the modern camp fire story:

That Small Business Loan will never be approved with your credit score.

Art is fleeting and no one will remember what you create.

Your refrigerator is dying and your bank account disagrees with this decision (speaking of which, purchase my books please)

The router name was only funny to you.

The Mortgage that Outlived You!

Parenting might just be Stockholm Syndrome gone awry.

The First Week of the Trump ‘Administration’

Your favorite college professor has forgotten you.

The Cell Phone Battery that stayed at 100% All Day, Because It Never Needed to be Used.

Your cat doesn’t care. Like, at all. About anything.

Leaving reviews on the internet only matters if they’re negative.  The mind is terrible like that.

Have you ever thought about the people making your clothing?

The books on your shelf are what brought you to this point.  Think of all the stuff you haven’t read.

 

 

Oh good golly this one took an unexpectedly dark turn.  It ends now!  But, uh, really, I have books for sale and a new fridge to buy.  Enjoy your week! Thanks for reading.

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