The Yoga Incident

Yesterday I did not write.  Usually when I miss a day’s post it is due to a migraine and I spend my usual writing hours in a dark room pressing my eyeballs into my head, pleading for sleep.  Migraines are weird.  Yesterday however, I was felled by a much more insidious and obnoxious malady; baby yoga.

My wife had the idea that perhaps calming, relaxing yoga before bed time would be good for our five year old.  She queued up a 15 minute kiddie yoga video on YouTube, cleared a spot in front of the TV and she and the five year old followed the instructor through a crazy adventure involving a sea horse just wanting to fit in.

Parental involvement in new things is always good, so I thought I would try to, to help encourage participation by the toddler.  Peer pressure works apparently.  At one point the video had every one doing something called “shark pose.”  The toddler was all about trying this one out.  This pose involves laying on the floor, putting your hands together and raise your arms to raise them skyward to make a fin.

I attempted to demonstrate.  Now, it is not that I am an unfit human, but I am not exactly a flexible human.  I get on the floor, tell the toddler to follow along, put my hands behind my back, and make my best effort to create a shark fin.

I I should not have done this.  I shrieked, my arms fell, the toddler laughed and then crawled on to my back saying “giddy up”.

Yoga is hard.  Kids are malicious.

I spent the rest of the night popping ibuprofen and keeping my arms at my side.


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