Quick bit on how I write. Most posts are centered around a single line, funny or not. Then I throw a few hundred words around making that line work out. Sometimes it does work out. Other times I meander and wind up making a joke about robot burritos…or something. Is it burritos for robots, or burritos that are robots?
Then there are the posts that start out with a picture, like the one above snapped in Roosevelt National Forest last weekend, found in my phone and the first line never comes. Start out with grand intentions, but at the end of the day even a robot burrito joke won’t cut it.
Today, I write of failure. Below are my attempts to find that one line that would lead to a funny story. Not enough coffee in the world to make any of them work though.
Here we go:
I don’t know if that Pokemon is worth it.
I really hate sky diving.
The map was clearly wrong.
JJ is directing the real world now?
Solar flares could kill us all at any moment and we’d never see it coming.
Last time I heckle a magician.
That squirrel will rue the day it ruined my shirt!
Everwood starring Tree-t Williams
Wait…solar flares really could just wipe us all out. Why aren’t we talking about this more?
Oh man! My Go Pro was pointing the wrong direction the whole time!
This Dana Carvey show better be worth it. <<I don’t know what this means.
No cell signal here. How will anyone find me if a solar flare does hit?
That will be a number 2 pencil one day.
Pro tip: Sasquatch is a myth. Wasted a day.
Looks like I picked the wrong day to stop sniffing glue. <<Should probably watch less Airplane
Cable repair gone terrible awry
No one ever said free range chickens could climb!
The things I do for a robot burrito.
I swear if an ewok shows up I’m leaving.
Sometimes it takes a nice walk through nature to be reminded of absolutely terrible Kid Rock’s music is.
The pursuit of just one line, one lousy line.