I have discovered more differences between my children of late.

Here, observe the toddler in his natural habitat; a studebaker. No. Not that. Wishing crates of food would be opened for him! That’s more accurate.

He has tried multiple cans of tuna, a tube of fruit snacks, even our spray bottle of olive oil. None suites his “needs”- he had just been fed and turned away from food, but, kinda like mono, he got bored and thought he was hungry. How on earth a toddler is bored, I do not pretend to understand.

When I snapped the photo he was aiming for chickpeas. Kid loves chickpeas, but had never seen them from a can before. Pretty sure the only thing he hates in this world is food unavailable to him.

While the toddler was trying to get a very unneeded snack, the firstborn was doing this:

Sitting within those two crates normally reserved for dirty laundry is the four year old. He was pretending to be in jail and needed to break free from Jabba the Hutt so he could go save the Falcon from a trash compactor and Darth Vader.

He also did not eat breakfast.

I don’t know when it happened, but the oldest now thinks food is a big waste of time. There are plastic crates that still smell slightly of soiled clothing to play with, after all. Every meal is now a battle of how many bites he must take before leaving the table and what exactly constitutes a full bite of food. He feels that any bit of food consumed is a full bite. That means the tiniest bit of food that fits on a fork will suffice to satisfy our commands. His mother and I feel that a bite should lend itself to filling a belly and avoiding the dreaded “hangry” mode of an unfed four year old.

Most of life is avoiding the hangry mode of an unfed four year old.

The toddler, by contrast, spends his free time thinking of food. As toddlers have nothing but free time, he thinks about food quite often.

If only there was a way to divide the toddler’s enthusiam for food between the two of them. Mellow the young one’s appetite and convince the firstborn that food is not going to end the world. Science, I need your help.


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