Well, In That Highly Unlikely Situation

Well, In that highly unlikely situation

To recap from the first one:

In “Well, In That Highly Unlikely Situation” the premise is a discussion of what would you do in the aforementioned unlikely situation.  There are only a handful of objects at one’s disposal to help in the solution to the problem too.  Situations and tools will be selected by google’s auto-complete search options, suggested by my wife, brother, or anyone else who wants to play.

The Situation: On a transatlantic flight, you have the middle seat.  On your left is Nicholas Cage and on your right is Quentin Tarantino.  The captain has refused to turn off the fasten seat belt sign.

The tools: A random lego in your pocket, your work ID from a local cable company and a nagging suspicion your vote for Ralph Nader went uncounted in 2000.

Well, in that highly unlikely situation…

I have to make the situation work for me here.  Of course, sitting next to two very talented folks for more than half a day seems interesting.  But they will not stop talking.  And the one is just drinking like a fish.  Do fish drink?  Not the point right now.  We’ve all seen the late show interviews and behind the scenes featurettes.  This is going to be a long flight.

Maybe I should just close my eyes and pretend to sleep.  That might work out.  Pass a few hours.

Is…is Tarantino only speaking in lines from Nicolas Cage movies?  That was from National Treasure.  If he says anything about the bees I am going to lose my mind.

And Cage is a Game of Thrones fan.  They are talking about Game of Thrones fan theories and one of them is only using movie lines.  This is the most surreal experience of my life.

“Hey, guys, you know if you move to my area I can hook you up with free cable.  All to GoT you can handle that way.”

There, now I feel like part of the moment.  I’ve made an in.  This is awesome!

The captain still distrusts the sky though.  That seat belt light is going no where.  That seems to be the larger issue with the voyage.

Oh goodness no the conversation is switching to obscure southern film directors from the 1960s.

“Guys, check this out!”

They seem to be interested in the deeper meaning of the Lego piece.  Why is this random Lego tall with six pegs on top?  Why was it not the two peg type?  Probably because you can never find those two peg types when you are looking for them, that’s why.

Ok, they are chatting between themselves now.  Still no mention of The Bees.

I have to go for broke on the seat belts now.  Pulling out the big guns.

“Folks, I have a confession to make.”

All eyes on me now.  Pretty sure the flight attendant is getting a taser ready though.

“I voted for Nader via a mail in ballot and I do not remember putting a stamp on the envelope.  I fear my voice was not heard all those years ago.”

No one seems to care, but the captain’s voice has filled the cabin.  Wait, why is he encouraging passengers to chat with my about the importance of voting?  I tried to vote.  I like voting.  It is the foundation of our society.  At least the seat belt sign is off now.

All of the other passengers have started talking in unison.  The exact same words.  Nicholas and Quentin are just smiling as they review the crowd.  Their eyes are huge right now, terrifying.

Oh my goodness, Nicholas Cage might truly be an immortal and telepathic being.  The internet is going to flip out.


In this highly unlikely situation, I have to rely on the legend of Nicholas Cage to save the day.  I’m ok with that.



Thanks for reading!

What situation is coming up next? Suggestions welcome in the comments!



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